Unsubtle
by Mara Hans
Summary: Valkyrie struggles with her feelings and is terrified she is being too obvious.
1. Chapter 1

Valkyrie, yet again, found herself watching him. It was becoming a habit she could not afford to have. There were so many reasons why it wouldn't work, why it wasn't possible, and yet she had that damn hope pounding in her chest, day and night, every time she spoke to him or looked at him or thought of him.

She shook her head in an attempt to clear it. Skulduggery glanced over at her from the driver's seat.

'Headache?' he asked.

She chuckled dryly. 'It's that damn cologne you're wearing. If I didn't know any better I'd suspect you wear it purely to annoy me…'

'Valkyrie, there was never any doubt that I wear it purely to annoy you; I plan my days around your irritation.'

'And I plan my life around yours'

'Yes I had noticed that, I've been meaning to ask; are you planning on getting your own life any time soon or is this puppy-like attachment a permanent arrangement?'

'I'm quite content for now. When you realise you can't live without me I suppose I'll have to move on.'

'Eight years, hasn't happened yet'

'And you had to put up with Fletcher for the majority of them, I figured once he started hanging around you'd cut me loose'

'I feel that is a testimony to my patience and grace; I have put up with a girl of questionable intelligence and a boy with ridiculous hair for the greatest years of my life'

'I'm pretty sure the greatest years of your life were when you were _alive_...'

'How fortunate I'm not insecure about my state of existence'

'How fortunate the sheer size of your ego makes it impossible for you to be insecure about anything'

He harrumphed indignantly. 'I don't like you'

Skulduggery parked the car outside the tattoo parlour and the pair made their way up to the front door, just as Ghastly pulled up in the van.

'Morning Ghastly' said Valkyrie brightly, waving enthusiastically as he joined them.

Skulduggery and Ghastly both looked at her.

'Someone's unnecessarily cheerful this morning' said the tailor, eyebrows raised.

Valkyrie reddened unnoticeably and scolded herself inwardly. _Idiot, calm down._

'Someone's unnecessarily grumpy this morning' she countered. The truth was she was just in a good mood after spending the morning in the car with Skulduggery. Good God this was becoming pathetic. She glanced at him as he knocked on the door. Sooner or later he was going to guess, if she couldn't start controlling her general ridiculousness, and that would be the worst possible thing that could happen, at all, in the world. Ever.

Finbar Wrong answered the door in a towel and positively lit up at the sight of Skulduggery.

'Skul-man!' he cried and dropped his towel as he went in for a hug. The intended hug-ee physically flinched and backed away, hands in the air warding off the naked onslaught. 'Whoooaaaa Finbar the suit, the suit!'

Finbar stood in confusion for a moment before shivering, noticing the fallen towel and hastily wrapping it around his waist.

'Gotcha Skul, always fully clothed, c'mon in, you haven't seen your godson in months! Val, Ghastly' he said nodding at them, gripping the towel as he stood aside.

'Finbar, I'm not your son's godfather'

'Oh yeah you're right, sorry man. Ghastly that's your area of expertise'

'Not me either mate'

Finbar scratched his head good-naturedly. 'Wonder who it is then… Tea? Coffee? Peach?'

They seated themselves on the mismatched chairs in Finbar's living room/tattoo parlour, Valkyrie taking the tattoo chair.

'Hey Fin how 'bout a tattoo?' she inquired casually.

'Yeah sure wha-?' Finbar began.

'Absolutely not' interjected Skulduggery.

Valkyrie turned to him slowly.

'Pardon?'

The skeleton sat very still and said nothing. From the way he held his head she could tell he was frowning. She continued to look at him.

'Nothing' he said quietly.

He was, in Valkyrie's opinion, still coming to terms with the end of her childhood, despite the fact that it had ended long before she turned eighteen, let alone twenty. It saddened her to think he still thought of her as a child; just one more reason why it would never work. _Why __what__ would never work? _she thought to herself angrily, _what exactly do you want here?_

It was a good question, she didn't know what she wanted to happen, all she knew was that she wanted _something _to happen.

He avoided her gaze and got back to business. 'Finbar, we're here for some help. We've heard some rumours lately from other psychics, unreliable of course but worrying all the same. We were wondering could you _please put on some trousers!_'

Finbar scrambled into the next room and reappeared wearing scruffy jeans.

'We were wondering could you look forward only a week or two, to clarify they're not true.'

'Sure man, anything for the godfather of my child.'

He set about gathering his things. Skulduggery shook his head.

*0*0*0*

Despite Skulduggery's assurance that the above named rumours were indeed only rumours, Finbar's vision left the party feeling decidedly nervous. True, they hadn't seen anything that looked like the end of the _world_; no figure in black massacring millions of people, but they did see a lot of empty streets and they did hear a lot of sobbing from sources that weren't visible. It was undeniably chilling. Even Skulduggery admitted he hadn't expected it to look so…_dark. _

'What do you think causes it?' asked Valkyrie in the car afterward, Ghastly following them in the van.

The detective remained silent for a few moments, the engine purring soothingly in the background.

'I'm not sure' he said finally. 'There didn't seem to be any sign of violence; no broken glass, no bodies strewn across the street, no blood, no debris. But then why would there be so many people crying? Why would everyone hide indoors if the event that caused sadness had already happened?'

'Unless they were crying in anticipation of something bad? Maybe a comet is bound for earth or something?'

Skulduggery nodded in approval. 'Yes we're going to have to consider options like that. Still, it's all a bit suspicious. We definitely need to look into it further. With my expertise and your good looks we'll undoubtedly solve it.'

They drove on to Haggard in silence, Valkyrie desperately trying to suppress the flare of excitement that rose inside her when he jokingly complimented her. She could feel her cheeks reddening with a mixture of joy and embarrassment at that joy. This was so humiliating. She shifted in her seat and turned to look out the window, all but pressing her cheek against the cool glass to cool herself down.

'Valkyrie?' her partner asked, causing her to jump in her seat. 'Are you quite alright?'

'What? Yeah, of course, yeah, why wouldn't I be?' _Good God pull yourself together woman…_

'You just seem to be falling out the window. I had admittedly always assigned to you puppy-like tendencies but hanging your head out of a moving car seems a bit extreme, even for you.'

Valkyrie punched him in the arm and scowled. 'Shut up, if your car wasn't so bloody warm…'

'I think the temperature is spiffing'

'You can't _feel_ temperature'

She said it with more venom than she had intended, in an effort to conceal her earlier discomfort. Skulduggery turned to look at her, tilting his head gently to the side.

'Are you sure you're alright?' He had an edge to his voice that Valkyrie hadn't heard before.

_Oh my God he knows. Oh crap. Oh crap. Oh crap._

She laughed nervously, almost hysterically. 'Skulduggery I'm _fine _stop being such a worrywart!'

Oh Christ did she just say worrywart? She tried yet again to cover up:

'I'm just a little tired today, I think I'm coming down with something, flu maybe, it's probably nothing, maybe it is, I don't know I'm not sick that often, well, not as often as most people, but I suppose considerably more often than you are, what with you being a skeleton and all, well I suppose I never really asked you do you get sick? Do you get colds? I suppose you'd need to feel cold to get colds, well then again I've no idea how colds work I'm not a doctor, I'm not Kenspeckle, ha…ha…'

Oh. God. Make it stop.

Skulduggery glanced at her again and shook his head slightly, but said nothing.

They drove the rest of the way in silence, Valkyrie mentally shouting at herself for the entire time. At this rate not only was he going to cop on, but she was going to destroy any friendship they had at the moment, by causing him to gradually realise that she was too crazy to be a functional partner.


	2. Chapter 2

Valkyrie lay in bed that night and cried. Actually _cried_. And not just your casual few tears when you're lying down and no one's there, but great heaving sobs that she couldn't control. And then every so often it would dawn on her why she was crying and she'd cry even more over how pathetic it was.

_Get over it you absolute loser!_

She slammed her head against her pillow a few times in an attempt to regain some of her dignity. Eventually the sobs subsided and she sat up and rubbed away the tears staining her cheeks. She wasn't even entirely sure why she was crying. Obviously Skulduggery was at the centre of it all, but she couldn't understand it. She _knew _nothing could happen. She _knew_ he didn't – couldn't- like her in that way. She was fully aware any inclination she gave of this lapse in sanity on her part would most likely change things between them irreversibly. And God knows she wouldn't be able to live with that.

As much as she hated to admit it, Skulduggery, as her best friend, was the best thing she had going for her. She loved her family, especially Alice, she loved Tanith and Ghastly and Fletcher and even China in her own way, she loved having magic and she loved her job and everything that came with it, but she _needed _Skulduggery. Again, pathetic. She often wondered why him more than her family, and she had arrived at the conclusion that she had somehow gotten used to the idea that her family may not always be there, especially as she could very well be the ones to kill them. Plus they didn't know her. Not really. She was a completely different person to the little girl she had been eight years ago. And Skulduggery knew it all, understood it all, accepted it all.

Her thoughts were becoming too sappy for her liking, so she rose and crept downstairs to get some water.

The skeleton at her window was still, hand still raised about to knock on the glass, frozen by the sight of the hysterical girl he had always known to be so calm.

The kitchen was cool and dark and calmed her down considerably. She gulped down a cold glass of water, poured herself another and slumped at the kitchen table. Now that she had controlled herself she decided it was time to formulate some sort of plan. This had gone too far. She did not _cry. _Into her _pillow. _She was going to have to change something, and quickly before Skulduggery found out or she lost it all together and followed the pillow-crying with a nice tattoo of his name somewhere and a love song in her diary. She considered her options. Obviously the best solution would be the detective professing his undying love for her, but she was not quite so deluded. Therefore, the option of telling him was definitely not on the cards.

Her skin prickled as she realised what the other option was. She had feared it would come to this, even before she really knew what she was feeling. Oh God this was going to be hard. Valkyrie stood up and knocked back the rest of her water before resolutely deciding to stay away from her best friend as much as she possibly could.

**0*0*0*0*0**

The car journey the next morning was sufficiently awkward, but neither Valkyrie nor Skulduggery knew what the other was uncomfortable about.

Skulduggery was, understandably, confused and concerned about what he had seen, and also felt a little guilty for what could only be described as spying. Did she often cry? Was there something serious going on she was keeping from him? Nothing could possibly be as big or upsetting as the Darquesse thing, but you never really knew with Valkyrie. And he couldn't exactly start off with 'so Val, I saw you sobbing in bed last night while I was watching through your bedroom window, what's up…?'

Valkyrie had resolved to distance herself from him, there was no other option, so she remained unusually quiet and decided that she would act as one should around their work partner, not their best friend/love of their life. It was not easy, and as they sat there in awkward silence it dawned on her that maybe there was no saving the friendship they had before this. Maybe she had ruined the best thing that had ever happened to her, and had no idea how to fix it.

They arrived at Ghastly's shop to find Tanith and Fletcher already there. Tanith and Ghastly were shouting at each other across the living room when they walked in, with Fletcher cowering for cover in the kitchen, making tea. Valkyrie hurriedly joined him, eager to leave the skeleton's company, while Skulduggery attempted to calm down the irate pair.

'What is it this time?' asked Valkyrie, accepting the steaming mug Fletcher handed her.

'Oh, the same as always,' he whispered. 'He doesn't like her talking to Sanguine, but she insists he's not as bad as everyone thinks.'

Valkyrie raised her eyebrows sceptically. 'She's still saying that?'

Fletcher nodded solemnly.

'Mmhmm. But I suppose she did spend three years in his non-stop company, fighting by his side, _always_ by his side. Whether it was a remnant or not, it was still _her_ that he looked out for for all that time. I can kind of see how it would be hard to… let

go of… '

Valkyrie said nothing and sipped her tea. She could see where Fletcher was coming from. Even when she was Darquesse she still noticed people and how they reacted to her. And she had never been Darquesse for more than a few hours. _Three years _was a large portion of Tanith's life. Still, she didn't like the idea of her best friend having anything to do with the monster that was _Sanguine._

A crash from the next room caused them to abandon their tea and run in, ready to defend or restrain, depending on the situation. They stopped short when they saw Skulduggery standing on the couch, holding Ghastly up against a wall by manipulating the air and holding Tanith back by her hair.

'Em, help?' he asked in an irritated tone.

Fletcher and Valkyrie pinned Tanith down while Skulduggery placed a defeated Ghastly on the ground gently.

'Now are we all calm?' he asked angrily.

Ghastly mumbled something and Tanith stopped struggling and nodded reluctantly.

'Good' growled Skulduggery. 'It would be wonderful if we could leave you two alone for a few minutes and trust you to act like adults, you know.'

Tanith grumbled as she got to her feet and brushed herself off. Ghastly shot her a dirty look.

'Yeah' Valkyrie chimed in. 'I think Fletcher nearly peed in the kitchen.'

'Hey-' the boy began, but was cut off by Skulduggery.

'Now where is China?'

'Fashionably late, as always,' came the smooth reply from the doorway as China Sorrows strolled in, looking unsurprisingly yet startlingly immaculate. 'Fortunately, if my ears aren't deceiving me, or I would have been present to witness the Renn boy soil himself.'

She seated herself on the coach where Skulduggery had been standing moments ago.

Fletcher blushed furiously and elbowed Valkyrie for laughing.

'So shall we begin?' she asked sweetly.


	3. Chapter 3

**Thank you very much to those who commented it quite literally made my day.**

China, for someone who was usually unerringly composed, looked a little ruffled by the fact that she hadn't heard much about the strange visions. Well if China was unnerved, Skulduggery was flat out worried.

'You've heard nothing? At all?'

China frowned slightly. 'Not _nothing, _I've heard _some things, _just not anything more interesting than what you already know. And that confuses me.'

They all remained silent for a moment. Skulduggery sat in the armchair opposite China, Valkyrie and Ghastly on the couch. Fletcher had taken up a position on the arm beside Valkyrie, and Tanith was sitting on a kitchen chair next to Skulduggery, glowering at Ghastly every once in a while.

It upset Valkyrie to think that they were fighting. When Tanith had been saved from the remnant Valkyrie had been almost as happy that she could finally get together with Ghastly as she had been about getting her sister back. She knew all this fighting must be even harder on Ghastly. He had fought to get her back for so long. It was Ghastly who had sought out Dr Nye, Ghastly who had convinced it to tell him the process of ridding Tanith of the cursed remnant, Ghastly who put himself in grave danger just to get her back. The story still chilled Valkyrie. Skulduggery had told her in confidence that Ghastly had gone to Nye's den, agreed that it could work at the sanctuary, and then when the monster still wasn't satisfied, agreed to let it examine his scarred face. Valkyrie was still trying to adjust to the idea of that thing going anywhere near her friend with a scalpel. She knew from experience the horrors of his experiments.

Ghastly hadn't told Tanith he had sought out Nye. All she knew was that the Doctor spent three years in the Sanctuary research lab learning about remnants. Then one day he arrived in Ghastly's office claiming he knew how it was done, and all he needed was the possessed one. Valkyrie still remembered the day they had caught Tanith. They had managed to lure Sanguine into the Sanctuary and, must to Ghastly's concern; remnant-Tanith had stormed in to rescue him. Nobody was entirely sure what Nye had done in the operating theatre, and Ghastly would never speak of it. Skulduggery often voiced that Ghastly wouldn't have allowed the Doctor to harm her, but Valkyrie could hear the concern in his voice. She wasn't sure she wanted to know what had happened in that operating theatre.

China rose suddenly, snapping Valkyrie out of her reverie.

'Well, if that's all I can do…' She ran her hands over the sharp pleats of her pencil skirt, smoothing imaginary creases.

'Yes, thank you so much for all your help,' said Skulduggery dryly.

'None of your snide remarks Detective' replied China coolly. 'I'll ask a few questions, call in a few favours, but it seems to me you're chasing shadows here. You have no inside lead. I, for one, am not a fan of wasting my time on rumours and suppositions.'

Skulduggery nodded his head, stood, and tipped his hat as she left the room. His gaze seemed to follow her as she left, an action that did not slip Valkyrie's notice, despite her determination not to look at him so often. She was angry with herself for being so pathetic. She had always suspected that China and her best friend had a romantic history; she had seen enough clues, whether from Gordon or Tanith or even some of the comments the pair made when in each other's company, or the smiles they occasionally shared. Valkyrie often had trouble coming to terms with the fact that Skulduggery had lived approximately four hundred years without her. She wished she knew everything about him, but it was, of course, impossible. And sometimes she got the impression there were still many things he didn't want her to know. As if she wasn't insecure enough about their relationship…

Skulduggery sat back down on the armchair, glancing at Valkyrie as he did so. She had been acting strange since she had first gotten in the car, and it was worrying him to the point that he was being distracted from everything else going on. He hadn't fully comprehended at the time how shaken he had been by her tears, but the more he thought about it the more unnerved he became, to the point where it was all that occupied his mind. What on earth could she have been crying about so hysterically? Suddenly it dawned on him that maybe it was nothing to do with Darquesse or any of that, maybe it was to do with Fletcher? Skulduggery glanced over at the boy sitting beside her. The relationship seemed normal, comfortable. They hadn't been together romantically for years, but maybe something had re-ignited recently, and it had just slipped Skulduggery's attention? He was sitting awfully close to her, were they always so close? The skeleton cursed himself for not paying more attention in the past. Damn that Fletcher boy, he was no good for Valkyrie! She had been so upset the last time and now here he was again, distracting her from the important things. Skulduggery checked himself. At Valkyrie's age, those _were _the important things. Despite all her talk and all her experience she was still young, so much younger than he was, and still needed to live her life recklessly for a while.

_While she still can _said a dark voice at the back of his mind.

Skulduggery sighed inwardly and attempted to turn his attention back to the conversation between the others. Valkyrie could handle her own boy troubles, if that's what she was upset over at all, and a four-hundred year old skeleton trying to protect her by observing her turmoil through a pane of glass was no helping factor in the equation. He would just have to worry in silence.


	4. Chapter 4

Once the business end of things had been discussed, (or rather puzzled over in silence as they didn't have much to go on) the group siphoned off in to twos and threes. The major objective of this was to keep Tanith and Ghastly from each other's throats, but Valkyrie specifically positioned herself as far from Skulduggery as possible without drawing attention to her unprecedented awkwardness. Despite the majority of her attention being taken up by the skeleton's every movement, Valkyrie was thoroughly enjoying spending time with her best friend. She had missed having a girl's perspective on everything, especially one expressed through Tanith's witty sense of humour.

The two girls chuckled about nothing in particular for a while, then as Fletcher returned with more tea they turned their good humour to him for another while, and for his part he took the slagging as stoically as could be expected. Skulduggery and Ghastly remained on the other side of the room talking idly, the former trying to avoid the situation with Tanith as best he could to avoid the upset of his friend. He, too, was distracted however by a girl across the room, though not quite for the same reasons.

Skulduggery couldn't help but notice Valkyrie's movement across the room after Fletcher. So he had been right; there was something going on there. No, no matter how hard he tried to accept this he did not like the idea of Valkyrie and the boy. Fletcher liked her too much for it to be a healthy relationship, and they had too much history there. What if she got bored again and strayed down paths darker than even Caelan? What if Fletcher was still sore from her last rejection and was cruel enough to wait until Valkyrie was truly attached before breaking her heart? Or worse than that still, sweet mother of God, what if it actually worked out, and she _married _the boy? Skulduggery physically shuddered at the idea. He glanced over at the two, and his metaphorical heart sank as he saw Valkyrie looking at Fletcher, tears of laughter spilling from her eyes. How had he missed this before? But this still didn't explain her distress last night? The skeleton continued to mull over this as Ghastly fell silent, noticing the direction in which his friend was looking.

'Tanith is still seeing Sanguine' he said darkly, his expression clouding rapidly.

Skulduggery cursed himself inwardly and dragged his attention back to the present.

'I had guessed as much' he said quietly. 'Do you know why?'

Ghastly sighed and looked at the floor. 'She says it's nothing…physical…or romantic, but I can't see why else…'

'Ghastly,' his friend began carefully, 'she spent three years of her life with him. There's bound to be some-'

'Some what?' Ghastly interrupted in annoyance. 'Some feelings? Some friendship? Some chuckles every once in a while remembering the good old days? It's not right! You _know _it's not right! He's evil and she knew that before and she knows it now but she still _sees _him, after he kept that remnant inside her for so long! _He _helped hide her from us for all that time! He took three years of her life that we can never get back!'

His voice broke on the last word and his shoulders slumped.

The room had gone quiet. Tanith was staring at Ghastly with a strange look on her face. Fletcher was staring uncomfortably at the ground and Valkyrie was looking at Skulduggery with a pained expression. He honestly didn't know what to do. They stayed that way for a few endless moments, until Tanith croaked:

'Ghastly…'

'I'm sorry' he cut in quietly. 'I shouldn't have said anything. This has nothing to do with me.'

He rose to leave, keeping his eyes directed away from everyone. Tanith stood too.

'Ghastly, please, you don't understand-' she moved as if to touch him, but the tailor shrank back from her.

'I don't _understand?_ Pray, tell, Tanith, what is there to understand about this?' He kept his voice very controlled, very low.

'Ghastly...' pleaded Tanith.

'No, no, I won't get angry this time, I just need you to explain to me in reasonable terms what there is to _understand_ about this situation.'

Tanith looked caught somewhere between fury and tears; she moved an inch towards him, adopting an attacking stance.

Valkyrie flitted to Skulduggery's side and touched his sleeve, unnoticed by the pair. He met her gaze and took it to mean 'we should leave now', but he was reluctant to abandon the scene when preventative measures may be needed against the probable clash about to take place.

'Look, Ghastly, I get that you got me back, I _get _that you spent three years searching for me, and I know that you gave up a lot, but you don't _own_ me! You weren't with me for all that time; you don't know what it was like. I _remember _everything. I remember everything I did making sense at the time. Sure I look back now and realise I was pure evil, a raging bitch, but it was still my mind! And the thing that's harder to get rid of is the relationship I had with Billy-Ray during that. Because while I know all the killing and all the torture I did was wrong, there was nothing I did with him that my conscience goes against now. He was kind to me then and he is kind to me now. My brain detects no change.'

Ghastly stood still, staring at her, his expression unreadable. Tanith had tears rolling down her cheeks. Valkyrie noticed that Fletcher had teleported at some point during that, and was reminded of his general dislike of awkward situations. She also noticed that her hand still rested lightly on Skulduggery's forearm but couldn't bring herself to remove it. Everything in the room just remained still.

Eventually Ghastly spoke very slowly, very darkly:

'You're right Tanith. I don't understand.'

And he stalked from the room, slamming the door behind him.


	5. Chapter 5

The sound of the door slamming echoed around the room.

Tanith made no noise as she cried, the tears just continued to fall. Valkyrie and Skulduggery didn't move, frozen in stunned silence. Valkyrie had never seen Ghastly like this, never so cruel, so cold, so angry! And with Tanith of all people… Another shocking factor in the equation was Tanith actually _crying. _If Valkyrie never cried, then Tanith didn't know what tears _were._ Her friend didn't know how to react; should she comfort her? Leave? Slap her and tell her to snap out of it? One thing was clear, Skulduggery wasn't going to be of any help in this situation; he hadn't moved at all. Somewhere in the back of Valkyrie's mind a voice told her _see! You could never tell him how you feel; this is how he would react, but worse! _

She shook her head slightly and got to her feet. The skeleton's head followed her but Tanith didn't seem to notice. Valkyrie walked over to her slowly, and carefully, gently, pulled her almost-sister into a hug. Tanith barely reacted, other than leaning slightly into Valkyrie's body.

They stayed this way for a long time, Skulduggery motionless on the couch and the two girls in embrace.

'I'm going to go talk to him,' Tanith croaked eventually.

'Maybe you should give it a while…' said Skulduggery, speaking for the first time. 'When he's this angry he becomes unreasonable-'

'I need to sort this out as soon as possible. Remember what happened the last time I left something unsaid? It was too late and we were apart for three years, during which I tried to kill him multiple times. I'm speaking to him now.'

Skulduggery couldn't argue with that, so he nodded, rose, and left the room, leaving Valkyrie to wish her friend luck.

'What will you say?'

Tanith met her gaze grimly. 'I've wasted too much time already; whatever needs to be done.'

She then proceeded to sweep past Valkyrie and out of the room, leaving her friend more than a little confused.

O*O*O*O*O*O

Valkyrie wandered back outside and found Skulduggery waiting for her against the car, hat low over his eyes, staring at the ground. Her heart leapt at the sight of him, still here, and her brain chastised her for doing so. _You're supposed to be avoiding him fool!_

Torn, she walked up to him but stopped before the car. Skulduggery looked up as she approached.

'What did she say?' His velvet voice was gentle, questioning; he wouldn't push if she didn't want to tell him.

'She wasn't very clear. In fact, I've no idea what she said at all. Something about doing what needs to be done…' She could talk to him like this couldn't she? This was your average, work partner stuff, discussing colleagues, nothing too intense… She risked a glance at him and saw he was looking back at the ground, apparently lost in thought. Thinking of what? Could he sense her nervousness?

Ugh, all this guessing and hiding was exhausting. Valkyrie slumped against the car next to him and sighed. This plan was going to be difficult.

They remained there for a while, leaning against the car in silence, each absorbed by their own thoughts.

'Valkyrie?'

Something stirred within her at the sound of him saying her name. She suppressed it.

'Mmhmm?'

'What do you think she should do?'

'Tanith?'

'No, your grandmother about the neighbours…'

'I think… she should do whatever will keep her mentally stable right now. She's been possessed for too long a time for her to come back and be in a good place. She puts on a brave face but who knows how she's dealing with this? I know Ghastly is only looking out for her, but…'

Skulduggery looked down at her but she didn't meet his gaze.

'And do you think now she's gone to do something rash?'

Valkyrie sighed and shrugged.

'I don't know. I also know that she loves Ghastly, deep down. I don't know what that means, I suppose.'

Skulduggery didn't say anything, but didn't look away either. Curious, she turned to him. He had his head tilted to one side.

'And what about you, Valkyrie? You have seemed awfully…sad…lately'

He took her by surprise; his voice was so gentle and filled with concern that it brought a lump to her throat. How much could he know? How much had he guessed? She searched his unyielding skull for some sort of clue but was, of course, unsuccessful.

'What makes you say that?' she whispered, unsure whether her voice would break.

'I just… Valkyrie, you know you could talk to me about anything, don't you? No matter how serious or how trivial. I can give you my opinion, my best…advice. Not that you'd pay attention to it anyway, eh?' he added, in an attempt to alter the frozen mask of pain her face had settled into. It didn't work. She just stared at him, and, oh God, were they _tears_ filling her eyes? What on earth was going on here? The skeleton was at a loss. What had the Renn boy done to her?

'Val, what on earth-?'

Valkyrie suddenly realised she was staring blankly at him, not only not responding to his perfectly normal statement, but also weeping silently as he looked on in confusion.

_For the love of all that is good and holy pull yourself together woman._

She broke eye contact, shook her head vigorously and cleared her throat.

'Pfft, like I'd come to you for advice, who was it that introduced an innocent twelve-year-old girl to a life of crime?' She added a weak smile for good measure.

Skulduggery was distressed by this wall she kept throwing up between them. Didn't she trust him? _Why would she trust you with her boy troubles you nitwit you're a four hundred year old man? _

Resigned, he dropped the subject.

'I beg your pardon, I introduced you to a life of crime _fighting_, the subtle difference being we work on the side of the law. If anything you are now a more wholesome, better fulfilled human being. I'll accept that thank you card any day now.'

'What, are you not entirely satisfied with the unerring gratitude you received from all our previous Grand mages? Do you sometimes feel unappreciated? I always found they had the highest regard for you…'

'What- was that cheek? Are you being lippy? Dear Lord I hate women with an opinion…Do me a favour, get back to the kitchen, I feel you're getting a bit rowdy'

'Ah, resorting to chauvinism when lacking a good retort, I admire you so much more now that I've heard that. You'll never believe the talk on the streets these days, all this about gender _equality…_ I'd make your opinions known before it's too late and women get the vote or something'

'What? The vote! Good heavens, don't speak so freely Valkyrie, you'll be arrested one of these days!'

Valkyrie's eyes widened in mock horror.

'Arrested? As in taken to _prison?_ Oh dear me, whatever must that be like!'

'A dark and terrible place, my dear, one to which you will hopefully never be exposed. One so young and harmless as yourself should steer well clear of the folks there…'

'Why, thank you for warning me kind sir, I'll be sure to avoid conversing with them next time I'm beating them up.'

'You be sure to do that now'

Valkyrie shouldered him playfully, letting her guard down just for a moment. 'It's a wonder you found a wife at all. I'll bet she kept you in line.'

The detective chuckled wryly and sighed. 'Oh, you can be sure she did just that. Right, I have places to be and people to irritate, let's get you home.'


	6. Chapter 6

Hey, sorry that took so ridiculously long; I was putting it off for a while, exams and the like! Thanks so much to those who reviewed I really take it on board!

Valkyrie tossed and turned all night that night. At least this time there was no pathetic sobbing, but she really didn't find much comfort in that fact. She woke early Saturday morning, (if you can call it waking when you haven't been to sleep), and went for a run along the pier to clear her head or drown herself, depending on which was the more achievable of the two once she got there. After an hour of intense jogging she collapsed onto the bench overlooking the sea. She had, unsurprisingly, been unable to get Skulduggery out of her mind for the duration of her run, and by this point she was so incredibly tired of feeling guilty about it that she accepted for the time being that she was a ridiculous person, in love with her partner, and would undoubtedly ruin her life with her stupidity, and there was absolutely nothing she could do about it. Now, it was time to actually think about the case they were supposed to be solving.

The visions the seers had been having were irritatingly unclear. Despite Skulduggery's reminders that they had not in any of them seen even a glimpse or inkling of Darquesse, Valkyrie still had a horrible feeling in the pit of her stomach that she was behind it all. She relived the most recent vision they had seen, the one shown by Finbar.

_Dublin City, totally empty, not a person in sight. The streets unnaturally clean, tidy, bare. The chilling sound of sobbing in the distance, not only children, but the wails of women and the gruff cries of grown men. And everything was dark, cold, as if under an inescapable shadow._

Valkyrie couldn't work it out. The sobbing reminded her of her humiliating displays of emotion the night before last, so she tried to focus on the empty streets. Maybe people were running from the shadow? But then why would they make so much noise if they were hiding? Unless the source of the shadow was something that could only see and was unable to hear their crying… Maybe they only needed to hide what could be visibly seen. Valkyrie had a sudden idea; maybe that was why the streets were so clean: the sobbing people had wanted to hide all signs of life? She stored the idea in the back of her mind for the time being. She wondered if they asked Finbar to look farther into the future would they see the source of the darkness shrouding the area. She doubted it. Skulduggery had told her there was a slim chance that the psychic would see much more than the others had at all, after his run-in with the remnant and Solomon Wreath. Wrong's mind had been stretched further than it was capable of, and there had been something, if possible, even more off about him than usual since then. Valkyrie worried about him a little.

She wandered back to her house and tried to decide what to do. She desperately wanted to call Skulduggery and 'go solve stuff', but that would entirely defeat the purpose of her 'stay-away-from-best-friend' plan. She showered for much longer than was necessary and played with Alice until her mother had to physically prise her from her grip to take the little girl to visit Fergus and Beryl. Valkyrie _even _considered going with them to her Aunt and Uncle's house, just to give herself some sort of distraction, but she found that even in this state of desperation she couldn't bring herself to deal with Fergus's bug-eyed dislike and Beryl's general being.

Eventually, after a two-hour-long lunch, Valkyrie decided to call Fletcher and use him as a distraction. It was quite literally a last resort. Tanith hadn't returned her calls and was quite possibly in a suicidal state after another screaming match with Ghastly. Ghastly was also not an option, as Valkyrie couldn't talk to him until she had heard from Tanith where they stood. Alice and her Mom were gone until the evening and her Dad was away with work. Any more time alone and she would without question give in and call Skulduggery. So, Fletcher it was.

'Hey Fletch,'

'Val? What's up?'

'How would you feel about an intense game of Wii tennis?'

There were a few moments of silence on the other end of the line.

'Emm… sure… can I ask why?'

'What? Come on, I'm bored! Can't two friends play Wii tennis every once in a while without needing a reason?'

'Yeah…No of course, hang on I'm just out of the shower. I'll be over in ten minutes.'

'Good,' Valkyrie responded. 'Bring your game face.'

O*O*O*O*O

Fletcher hung up the phone slowly. He and Valkyrie hadn't hung out alone in years. It had taken at least two years after they broke up for them to even be capable of standing in the same room alone without a severe state of awkwardness incapacitating them both. Why would she call up out of the blue? Maybe she had realised after their laugh in Ghastly's yesterday that she missed the fun they used to have. Because Fletcher had certainly realised it. He really missed her. He was fully aware that at the time they had needed to break up, but God did he wish that it hadn't been that way. He still wasn't over her, and of possible, the more he saw her the _less _over her he became. He couldn't help the flare of excitement that rose in him when he thought of being alone with her again. _Maybe she wants to…_ No. He couldn't think like that. He couldn't give himself false hope. He would go over to her house and see the lie of the land before he gave any thought to any sort of expectations. He quickly pulled on his favourite t-shirt and jeans, sprayed himself with aftershave and spent a further twelve and a half minutes styling his hair to obscene heights.

O*O*O*O*O

After seven aggressive games of tennis, three of bowling and eleven track sprints (95% of which were won by Valkyrie), the pair collapsed onto either end on the living room couch, panting. Valkyrie was beaming as she switched off the TV. She loved to win. Fletcher was grumbling about 'not being accustomed to the game' and 'having to take a second shower'. Valkyrie glanced at him and was so taken aback by his lack of composure that she doubled over in a fit of laughter.

'What?' he demanded angrily. 'What's so funny?'

'Your…hair!' she stammered through guffaws. 'It looks…so…silly!'

Fletcher's hand flew to his deflated locks, his horrified expression only serving to double Valkyrie's amusement. She was laughing so hard tears were flowing down her cheeks. The doorbell rang, and Fletcher grumpily rose to answer it, muttering to himself and combing his hair with his fingers. Valkyrie struggled to compose herself, but stopped short when she heard the voice of velvet coming from the hallway, her smile distorting to a look of horror. Fletcher returned to the room, looking as though his grumpiness had not been improved in the slightest by the skeleton's arrival, and Skulduggery Pleasant followed him into the room. Valkyrie couldn't believe it; she had been successfully distracted for the afternoon by Fletcher's general ridiculousness, but now all her mental turmoil returned with a crash. She stared at Skulduggery for a few moments as he took in the untidy room, before pulling herself together.

'Hey Skul,' she said in a shaky voice. 'What's up?'

Skulduggery didn't say anything; he just stared at her for a couple of seconds.

'Hey…' he said slowly. 'I'm sorry, I didn't mean to interrupt. I…' he trailed off, still staring at her.

_Oh my God he knows! He's wondering why I'm staring at him so blankly! Think, how would you normally act around him? _But she had begun to forget what normal was anymore.

'No, no you're not at all!' she injected some life into her voice, although to her it sounded like someone had just pumped her with a mixture of helium and arsenic. 'What brings you out here? Any news on the case? Want some tea?'

'No thank you, I can't actually drink tea…?'

'Ha, right, of course, I'm pretty sure I knew that already!'

He just continued to stare.

'Right Val, I'm going home' came Fletcher's dejected voice, and teleported away.

Skulduggery turned his head to the spot where the boy had just been standing. Something was very wrong here. He had decided to call over to Valkyrie's in Haggard to see if everything was all right with her. Usually she would call him on a Saturday and they would meet up and discuss things and generally hang out, but today he had received no call. Under normal circumstances he would have left it, but she was on his mind so much lately that he found himself worrying to excessive amounts, to the point where he just decided on a whim to call over. He didn't know what he had expected, but it was certainly not _Fletcher _at her door, looking as though he was in an exceptionally bad mood, and very sweaty. Then he found Valkyrie perched on the couch in tears, red in the face, unable to form a coherent thought or string a sentence together. And worst of all, she tried to pretend to himthat everything was normal, and throw up that wall between them yet _again. _And then Fletcher vanishes without so much as a goodbye or a friendly comment, in what could only be described as a thunderous mood? Yes, something had clearly happened here. Skulduggery was getting very nervous. Valkyrie wasn't speaking, but was staring at her hands in her lap, her cheeks still tear-stained. Why had they both looked so warm and dishevelled? Why was the room so messy? His mind skipped to the worst; Valkyrie's timid, nervous demeanour, Fletcher's exhaustion and anger, the tears…

'Valkyrie, that's enough, I want you to be honest with me,'

Valkyrie looked up at him in fear, her eyes wide, her knuckles white.

'What did Fletcher try to do to you?'


	7. Chapter 7

Valkyrie gaped at him in confusion for a number of moments, an almost-comical expression on her stricken features. Skulduggery stopped talking for a moment, suddenly unsure of himself, but when he mentally recapped on the scene he had just witnessed he decided to push on with his theory.

'What did that blasted boy do to you, Val?' he asked, leaning right forward in his chair, concern lacing his words.

She stared at him some more.

_Could it be possible he hasn't guessed…?_

'Emm… what did…who…'

He couldn't tell! He wasn't calling her up on her newfound infatuation! The blank staring and hyperventilation of the last 30 seconds hadn't given her away!

'Val?'

'Eh, what did…wait _what?_'

Her thoughts had finally caught up with the conversation.

'What did Fletcher do to me? What the hell do you mean?'

'Look Valkyrie, please confide in me. I know you might find it awkward or embarrassing but you're my partner and best friend and I'll be damned if that pathetic excuse for a human is getting away with sexual assault-'

Valkyrie really felt she needed to interrupt him there.

'Sexual _assault? _Skulduggery what are you talking about? Fletcher never, oh God, ew, no, he never did _anything…_of that sort of… God no!' The thought of it made her uncomfortable to say the least. Where had he got this idea?

Skulduggery simply rested his chin on the tips of his gloved fingers and regarded her in silence. She stared back, unable to make neither head nor tail of the situation.

'I wonder if you're lying…' said the skeleton thoughtfully, not removing his gaze from her.

'Skul, whoa, I really try and make it my business not to lie to you unless it's absolutely necessary, and in this case, had Fletcher ever done _anything _of that sort to me, I would unleash your wrath upon him without a second thought, but I promise to you, sweet Jesus, nothing like that ever happened!'

Skulduggery considered her for a minute more before deciding he believed her. He let out an enormous sigh of relief.

'Ooookay…' he said, releasing all the air from his non-existent lungs. 'That's a relief.' He froze and looked up sharply. 'And therefore the explanation for your red face and heavy breathing and Fletcher's quick departure when I arrived is…?' His voice had an edge to it.

Valkyrie copped what he was implying, and her eyes went wide.

'Playing Wii, we were playing Wii! Skulduggery no, nothing like that! That would be terribly cruel to him, plus I really don't like him like that anymore _at all._ I just, I don't know, needed a friend right then, so I called him.'

'Needed a friend,' said Skulduggery slowly.

Valkyrie knew what he was thinking, knew that probably hurt him, but what was she supposed to say? _I actually didn't call you because I think of you as so much more than a friend_?Yeah, that wouldn't give the game away at all.

To her utmost surprise, Skulduggery stood up suddenly, grabbing the tops of her arms and pulling her to her feet with him. He held firmly onto her shoulders and looked at her so directly that she couldn't look anywhere else.

'I need you to talk to me' he said throatily, desperately. 'Stop shutting me out Valkyrie.'

She genuinely forgot how to breathe. His face was very close.

'You tell me cryptic things like you 'need a friend' and do things that frighten me like sob hysterically at night when no one's watching but you never explain _why _and for the love of God what is so terrible that you can't talk to me about it? What could be worse than Darquesse and Vile and all the dark secrets we know already about one another?'

Valkyrie couldn't speak. She was close to tears. Oh, no wait, she was already crying, she just hadn't realised. _Dignified, Val, good work. _How could he know she cried that night? This was too much. It was destroying their friendship. She was losing his trust right before her eyes; with every second she continued this silence.

'Skulduggery, I…'

His grip was strong on her shoulders. She was going to lose either way; if she said nothing she would lose him, if she told him she would lose any sort of dignity or confidence that she possessed in his presence. A little voice in the back of her head made the decision for her. _At least if he knows he'll take pity and you can still spend time with him. _That really was the most important thing. She wouldn't be able to cope without seeing him, even if it was under pained circumstances.

'Skul, I… don't know how to say this, but…'

He was staring, staring so intently. _Oh God, how do I say it without sounding like a Disney teen movie…_

'I think I… might be…in-'

Then Skulduggery's hands were yanked from her shoulders as he was propelled sideways, right before her. Simultaneously she was thrown backwards over the back of the couch and crumpled painfully against the wall on the sitting room, before dropping to the floor in a tangled heap. She lifted her head with difficulty and scanned the room for Skulduggery and the very likely third party now present in the room.

'Oh crap'

The whole front window was shattered, as was a large portion of the walls on either side. Skulduggery was emerging from a pile of plaster and glass, looking distinctly rumpled but relatively unhurt.

'Valkyrie?' he barked, swinging his head around the room. She hauled herself to her feet and gave an unenthusiastic wave.

'Oh good. What on earth-'

He stopped talking and looked down to where an axe had just ripped through his jacket and embedded itself in at least two of his ribs. He cried out gruffly and they both snapped their heads towards the window, the direction from which the axe had come. At that moment, Valkyrie saw a blur below her and fell to the ground as an arrow pierced her leg just above her kneecap. She cursed, eyes wide and looked back up at their attacker. There, just outside the window pane, stood a young man, gawky-looking, boyish, a sheen of sweat on his face, a bow in his hand and a quiver of arrows on his back, the next one loaded onto the bow, aimed right at Valkyrie. He was also armed with another half-sized axe strapped to his chest, a dagger at his hip and two hand grenades on the ground at his feet. Before she could take in much more of this ridiculous situation she had to roll sideways behind the couch to avoid another arrow aimed for her face. It stuck in the wall, around about the spot where her head had been half a second earlier. She snapped the shaft of the first arrow from where it entered her skin and threw away the top, but was reluctant to pull the whole thing out; she had heard this could cause too much blood-loss. She peeped around the other side of the couch and saw skulduggery extracting the axe from his ribcage, eyes on the newcomer. With a hiss of pain he freed it and charged at the boy, batting his second fired arrow aside. Valkyrie stood up from behind the couch. Skulduggery hit him on the head with the butt of the axe before overpowering him so easily that the unnecessary arrow in her thigh irritated Valkyrie; this guy was less of a threat than Scapegrace! Skulduggery produced handcuffs and hauled him inside while Valkyrie hobbled out the window to make sure no one had seen this lunatic blow up the front of her house.

'Damn, Skulduggery, how do I explain this to my parents?' she cried, wincing as she lifted her injured leg over the rubble that had, ten minutes previously, been the outside wall of her living room.

Skulduggery placed all the boy's weapons on the floor beside the couch in a line.

'Hmm, that's a good point. You'll have to think of something really creative this time. I'd blame that guy who mugged your mum, he seemed to have a personal vendetta, it's plausible…'

'Skulduggery!'

'I'm just saying, of anyone, he'd be crazy enough to throw a hand grenade at the front of the house. The shooting of the arrows, however, less easily explained, it's like a bloody scene out of 'We need to talk about Kevin', but you're good at improvisation, you'll be fine…'

'Skulduggery, shut up! I have an arrow in my leg and a hole in my sitting room; _please_ fix one of them! My parents will be back in an hour or so!'

His gaze dropped to her blood stained tracksuit bottoms then flitted to the window.

'Ok, I'm reluctant to call the sanctuary as we don't know who this imbecile is, but I have a friend who can fix the wall if we're nice to her. You stay with Kevin here, I'll call her.'

As Skulduggery made the call, Valkyrie looked down at the handcuffed boy lying on the floor. He couldn't be more than nineteen or twenty. He was groaning in pain after Skulduggery's onslaught, and curled up in a ball. His hair was wild and mousy brown and his bones looked too big for his skin. He wasn't unlike Kevin from that movie. Valkyrie had always wondered what Kevin had been thinking when he shot everyone. Maybe Kevin wasn't the crazy one, like the film implied. Maybe the people Kevin was surrounded by were a pack of vampires and sorcerers and necromancers who were all out to kill him. Who would blame Kevin if that were the case?

Valkyrie spared him the kick to the stomach that she was intending to dish out as repayment for the searing pain in her thigh.


	8. Chapter 8

Thank you so much to those who reviewed I really appreciate it! Please let me know if you have any qualms or suggestions or general opinions I'd love to hear them!

O*O*O*O*O

Forty minutes later Skulduggery's friend reattached the last few panes of glass and finished repainting the frame. The whole job had taken about three and a half minutes in total. She was a tall, lanky woman with thick, straight hair of a golden-y colour that fell to her shoulders. She had small eyes and long limbs and did not look pleased to be there. Valkyrie wasn't too keen on her so far.

'You owe me for this, Skulduggery' the woman grumbled once she had finished. 'You know how to pay me back.'

'Mysta, I _told _you on the phone, Ghastly's going through some personal issues at the moment. I feel that you and him trying to rekindle that flame now is a bad idea…'

Valkyrie's eyebrows rose. What an interesting development.

'Skulduggery, I warned you; if you dragged me the whole way out here for _this_' (she gestured in irritation at Valkyrie and the front of the house) 'then I will expect appropriate payment! Ghastly and I have a connection, damn it! Now force him to meet with me!'

Valkyrie couldn't help it; she guffawed loudly at the ridiculous woman. Mysta turned towards her slowly, her eyes narrowing into a glare of hatred.

'_Who _do you _think _you _are, _girl? Are you _laughing_ at me?'

Valkyrie tried desperately to compose her face.

'Oho, I've heard stories about you, little miss Cain. So superior to everyone else, so beautiful and charming and talented! I'd watch myself if I were you, girl. Not everyone is so fond of you as you may think. In fact, I'd wager there are a large number of people out there who feel _quite_ the opposite!' She finished with a sneer.

'I am fully aware of that, thank you very much. And from what I've seen in the last five minutes I'm guessing that there are quite a number of people out there who aren't so fond of you either.'

Mysta drew herself to her full height, which was, admittedly, quite tall. 'How _dare_ you speak to me like that! Don't you know who I am?'

Valkyrie scowled. 'What? So it's ok for you to be rude to me but you can't take it yourself? That's big of you…'

The lanky woman made a strangled indignant noise. Skulduggery massaged his temples wearily with a gloved hand and sighed.

'You insolent obnoxious girl! You have made a dangerous enemy today fool, be warned! I am Madame Mysta Screen, of the great Dynasty of Architecturally apt Sorcerers, the greatest to ever exist! You will rue this day, I tell you from the bottom of my heart!'

Valkyrie was frowning at her in bewilderment. The 'architecturally apt sorcerer' spun on her heel, her shimmering gold poncho flapping behind her as she strode away from the newly repaired front face of the house and towards her car.

'Get Ghastly in touch with me, Pleasant,' she spat over her shoulder, 'or I shall be back at your house with my tools.'

She opened the door of her powder blue Triumph and turned back to deliver a final venomous glare.

Valkyrie waved cheerfully.

'Thanks for fixing my house!'

Mysta let out another screech of anger and slammed the door behind her before speeding off down the road.

'Really,Valkyrie? Must you?' asked Skulduggery in a bored voice.

'Skulduggery! She was ridiculous! I absolutely did not start that!'

He shook his head slowly, and using his theatre voice continued: 'I am owed favours from nobody anymore, no one invites me around to tea like they used to, no one pops by for a visit for fear that you'll be there…'

Valkyrie rolled her eyes and grinned, for once forgetting her emotional dilemma regarding the skeleton. 'Oh, you don't need them anymore now that you have me! I merely serve to highlight all their flaws and shortcomings, to show you what terrible company you kept before I rescued you from the thralls of terrible conversation and poorly brewed tea. You could say I saved your life.'

He stood still and looked at her very closely.

'Could you?' he said in an unreadable tone.

Suddenly all Valkyrie's worries and memories of the conversation she had been saved from came flooding back and she became flustered.

'Yes, yes of course, I am the queen etc., etc., now, as far as a remember we have a troubled youth in my sitting room, a hole in my leg and an axe wound in your ribs we need to tend to. Chop chop, we can't be unprofessional!' and she turned and hurried back into the house.

Skulduggery shook his head in real disappointment this time and followed her inside.

O*O*O*O*O*O

**Sorry it's so short and unexciting I fell out of the swing of things, I'll hop to the next chapter now! Please R&R **


	9. Chapter 9

"Kevin, why did you shoot me in the leg?"

"I was aiming for your face"

"Why did you shoot at me at all?"

"My name is not Kevin"

"We think you look more like a Kevin"

"I look more like what I am, which is a Thor"

Silence.

"Your name is Thor?"

"I am Thor"

"You chose the name _Thor?_"

"Thor is a name that suits my personality best"

"You went through all the names you could think of in the _world_ and you decided on Thor?

"Technically, Thor is not of this world"

"Right… I think we're going to keep calling you Kevin"

"Call me what you want, heathen"

Valkyrie turned to Skulduggery wearily. "If I had a penny for every time I've been called a heathen".

Skulduggery inclined his head distractedly. Valkyrie knew he was still thinking about their conversation. They had decided that although the newly-repaired sitting room wall wasn't likely to attract the attention of Valkyrie's parents, a handcuffed teenage boy and a debonair skeleton might invite a second glance, and so they bundled Kevin into the back of the Bentley and brought him to Skulduggery's house. Their would-be assassin remained stonily silent for the entire journey, and because Skulduggery was reluctant to push Valkyrie into talking with a stranger listening in, the car ride passed without conversation. Valkyrie had felt the tension pressing on her chest; all she wanted was to reach out and take Skulduggery's gloved hand in hers and just be comfortable again. Skulduggery had found it just as difficult. He cast glances her way every couple of minutes, but she determinedly kept her eyes fixed on the road ahead. His mind raced. He knew she had been about to tell him whatever the hell it was needed telling before they were attacked. The skeleton had felt a surge of rage towards the scrawny fool in the back seat, and took a corner rather sharply, causing the boy to topple into the inside of the door.

Now they stood in Skulduggery's living room, Kevin tied to a chair, Valkyrie standing in front of him and Skulduggery leaning against the bookshelf. He tried to snap himself out of his brooding. Stirring from his reverie he stood up straight and turned to the boy. "Thor is a ridiculous choice of name because you resemble neither a Norse God nor Chris Hemsworth. We shall call you Kevin. Valkyrie is not a heathen, that was impolite, especially after you shot her in the leg and nearly the face. And seeing as you impaled my ribcage with an axe, you owe me an answer or two. Who are you?"

Kevin glared at Skulduggery. "She is a heathen! I know who she is! I know what she's done! I saw it all, all of it…"

"So maybe I hit a guy or two, I'm doing it for the right reasons Kevin it's my job" retorted Valkyrie. "Skulduggery and I do the work other people don't want to. I don't see you volunteering"

"You crushed people with your mind" he said darkly.

This caught their attention.

"What did you say?" asked Valkyrie slowly.

Kevin looked up at her, eyes narrowed. "I know who you are. I know what you did in the Magillicuddy Reeks and I know what you will do. I've heard the prophecies. I know who you are!"

Valkyrie stayed frozen, willing him not to say it, cold fear seeping into her bones and under her skin and into her brain. Skulduggery had stepped up close behind her but remained motionless, waiting for this boy to utter their greatest fear.

It came out as a whisper. _"Darquesse"_

Valkyrie shut her eyes, shutting out the world for a few moments longer, before the implications of this could fully register in her mind. Nobody moved for several seconds.

She heard a soft click beside her and turned to see Skulduggery's gun aimed point blank at Kevin, dead set. "Just say the word Valkyrie and it's done," he said quietly.

She hesitated for a moment longer that she was comfortable with before pushing his arm down. "No, no, of course not, we can't just kill him," she sighed, while her friend lowered his gun. She thought he seemed relieved.

Kevin stared at both of them, trying not to show his fear but trembling slightly in the seat. "You're evil! You can kill me and I'll just be another on your list, but I have a family! I need to protect them, I need to stop you, _you_ need to stop you, don't you see? I was unoccupied by a remnant for a few minutes during your massacre. I know what was going on. I saw what you did and heard who you are before another one crawled down my throat. I remember. And if I remember who else does? I needed to kill you, I needed to protect my family"

He was looking at her so intensely, as if she needed to hear what he was saying, as if she didn't understand how terrible she could be. But she did understand. She looked sadly back at him.

"I'm not going to kill your family"

He barked a harsh laugh.

"I'm not!" she insisted. "I know I won't, because I have a family too. I know that the prophecies say I will kill them first. But I won't kill my family. I won't. I _won't_. So that means I can't become Darquesse, because I will do anything in my power to stop it. And if I can't-" she half glanced sideways towards Skulduggery, "-we have a back up plan. I won't kill my family. And that means I won't kill your family. I don't want to kill anyone"

Her voice came very near to breaking, and she fell silent. Kevin looked torn. It was as if he hadn't wanted to believe that he was actually right, that the prophecies were actually true. The room was silent for quite a while. Valkyrie slid into an armchair and tucked her knees up under her, and Skulduggery, after a halted, almost unnoticeable move in her direction, resumed his position against the bookshelf.

"How can I believe that?" asked Kevin eventually. "Even if you're telling the truth, how can I believe that this back-up plan of yours will work?"

Valkyrie looked at Skulduggery, and Kevin followed her gaze. He didn't look up from the floor, but spoke without emotion.

"Because I will kill Valkyrie myself if it gets that far."

Whether it was the skeleton's terrifying reputation, or his tally of dead enemies, or the heartbreaking tone of his voice when he said it, Kevin believed him.


	10. Chapter 10

Life went on.

Kevin was subdued; although he was still uneasy with the idea of Darquesse wandering around the city, ready to destroy it at any minute, somewhere inside him was the certainty that the skeleton would take care of it. He had an aura about him that Kevin had never found in anyone before, an authority. It was frightening and enthralling. The boy had left Skulduggery's house that day with a promise to keep their secret and a silent urge to return.

Valkyrie and Skulduggery were not getting past this rift. Days passed, and Skulduggery pushed her but she kept him walled out. It was affecting their work, in little ways that Valkyrie wouldn't have expected. She moved in to punch someone, and Skulduggery went high rather than low, missing the knockout blow. Skulduggery made a smart remark to a prisoner, and Valkyrie missed the trick he had set up. Whatever connection they had ceaselessly shared since their first meeting was fading. Valkyrie, not one for melodramatics, couldn't cope. On a few occasions, during an unbearable silence in the Bentley or pained look from Skulduggery, she had been on the verge of just blurting it out to him, confessing all the humiliating feelings and pleas and leaving the ball in his court. She could just follow him around for the rest of her life after all, even if he decided he wanted nothing more to do with her. He couldn't _physically_ stop her if she was really determined…

Another problem, which had been cast in the shadow of her all-consuming obsession, was that she had not heard from Tanith in two whole weeks. Valkyrie had planned to give her space and let her come for help or a drinking partner when she was ready, but she hadn't expected it to take this long. It never had before. She had no idea if Skulduggery (she suppressed the sharp pain in her chest at the thought of him) had been speaking to Ghastly about it, or speaking to him at all for that matter.

She suddenly felt a surge of rage at herself and her partner. What were they doing? Why was she being so childish and why was Skulduggery allowing her to be? Weeks of nonsensical behaviour when their best friends were having real problems and not a helping hand lent by either of them! Valkyrie looked down at her hands, trembling, with anger or guilt she wasn't sure, but she steeled herself and stood up violently.

That was enough. Enough ridiculousness. She wrestled her phone from her pocket and aggressively punched Skulduggery's number into the dial pad. He answered almost immediately. 'Valkyrie?' It came through the speaker urgent and slightly panicked.

_Enough ridiculousness, _she mentally yelled at herself, and for the first time in a long time, spoke to him normally.

'Skulduggery, we're being terrible friends, come and pick me up and we'll hunt down Tanith and Ghastly'

There was a pause.

'You're quite right, my dear, I'm on my way'

Ten minutes later, she slid into his front seat, slamming the door neatly behind her, and turned to face him.

'Enough of this?' she gestured from her to him and back a few times, raising her eyebrows.

It all almost went to hell when he looked at her for a few seconds, then replied: 'Deal'.

Oh God. Why was he so great? She had instigated it all and he was just letting it slide! He didn't grill her or even ask what the hell she'd been playing at?

_Stop it, get over it, he's giving you a chance to press on as if nothing had happened, take it! _

She shook her head violently, then after giving him a hard look, she took his hand and shook it firmly. 'Good. Let's be partners again.'

He nodded once, definitely.

'Now, let's go find them. Ghastly's shop first?'

'I think that's as good a place to start as any, and I wouldn't dare question you in a mood as overbearing as this'

She surprised herself by smiling genuinely. 'Sometimes the world needs someone with leadership skills to take charge Skulduggery; you're just not cut out for this kind of thing. Have you even led an army to the battlefield?'

'Goodness no, never even seen a battlefield. Knitting is really more my area of expertise. And crockery, I design a lot of crockery'

'You'll make a splendid elderly woman, Detective'

'I've always assumed so, yes'

'So, to Ghastly's?'

'Yes, oh enlightened one, give me a moment to warm up my arthritic fingers' he grumbled, before starting the car and pulling off. Valkyrie looked at him out of the corner of her eyes. It wouldn't be easy, but she could pretend it was normal. He certainly seemed to be trying. She loved him for it. And who knew? If they pretended long enough and tried hard enough she might just grow out of the idea, and her world wouldn't come crashing in on her and her life wouldn't tear itself to shreds and Skulduggery wouldn't back away at a run from her weird infatuated obsession.

Well, as long as Darquesse didn't take over before then. Because no amount of pretending was going to fix _that_ little problem for her.

Valkyrie sighed quietly and turned to look out the window as Skulduggery paid the toll at the bridge. She wasn't sure if she really believed that pretending was going to fix any of her problems at all.

'I think I'm going to have to start charging you for petrol, Cain, these motor costs add up'

She turned back to him with a grin. 'I think the lifetime of servitude I've pledged to you should cover it, no?'

'Lifetime of adoration, more like, I'm surprised you haven't erected a statue of me in the town square yet'

'A statue of a skeleton in a poorly tailored suit might put a downer on the townsfolk, don't you think?'

'Poorly tailored? That's the lowest blow you've dealt yet, young lady, but sticks and stones… I am magnificent'

And so they continued for the journey. Even if she didn't believe pretending would work, there wasn't a chance that she wasn't going to give it a try.


	11. Chapter 11

A wild goose chase around Dublin city ensued. Using their splendidly honed clue-finding and detective-y skills (as Skulduggery put it), they followed a trail of hints from Ghastly's shop to the sanctuary to a local bar to a train station back to the local bar to the all-you-can-eat Chinese buffet and finally to the quays where they found the tailor sitting on the edge of the river with his back to the Custom House. He looked unusually small.

'You're a difficult man to find, Bespoke' Skulduggery said tentatively, a tone Valkyrie had been unused to him using before the last few weeks. Ghastly didn't turn, but didn't tense at the sound of company either.

'Clichés don't suit you Skulduggery'

He spoke without emotion. Valkyrie looked at her partner, waiting for him to assess the situation. The extra few hundred years the skeleton had spent with Ghastly definitely gave him the reigns on this one. She wasn't in any position to try and judge the tailor's mood. If she were to give it a go, she would have sat down beside him, and stayed pretty silent. That was the way in which she knew how to be a friend to Skulduggery and Ghastly and Tanith and Fletcher; show support without too much talk of _feelings_ in the middle. It saved a lot of time and a lot of awkward situations. Skulduggery moved forward to sit down beside his friend. At least, that's what Valkyrie assumed his intention was, until he tipped Ghastly into the Liffey and stepped back beside her.

Ghastly's cry of surprise was quenched by the river.

'That should snap him out of it,' Skulduggery nodded cheerfully.

Valkyrie stared in bemusement at the spot in which the tailor had sat moments before. The sound of violent splashing could be heard over edge of the river bank, some obscene language, and after a minute or two the thundering, dripping figure of Ghastly Bespoke rose from the depths of the Liffey a few metres to their left, as he climbed the rungs to dry land. The three stared at each other in silence.

'Ghastly! My man, we've missed you,'

Ghastly glowered.

'It was the only way to be sure you weren't a vampire'

Ghastly glowered.

'It was Valkyrie..?'

'Don't drag me into this, I'm pitching tomorrow'

They both turned to look at her for a moment, and then Ghastly was on Skulduggery, simultaneously slapping him lightly across the cheekbone and wringing his wet clothes onto the beautiful suit.

Valkyrie left them at it for a few moments, mentally storing the scene, before separating them with a gust of air, and drying Ghastly off. She let the detective stew in the damp clothes, finding a strange pleasure in seeing him so ill composed. _No thoughts like that_ she scolded.

'Right, if you two want to continue I can wait in the car, but I'm quite cold here so if we could wrap this up?' she circled her hand a few times.

'Young lady, you're lying, my clothes don't let in the cold' grumbled Ghastly, but his voice led her to believe his spiralling depression hadn't plunged quite as far as she had originally feared. She gave him a small smile. He frowned slightly, and turned to Skulduggery. 'We need to talk'

'That sounds ominous' Skulduggery replied, but there was no joke to his voice. Valkyrie looked from one to the other, an uneasy feeling creeping over her skin and under her hair. 'What's wrong?' she asked quietly.

Ghastly didn't look at her, only at Skulduggery. 'Tanith is coming here shortly. She... I… She told me something we need to discuss.'

'We; you and Tanith, or we; you, Tanith, Valkyrie and myself?'

'The latter' he said, after a moment's hesitation.

'So you and Tanith are ok?' asked Valkyrie, brightening. 'You're speaking again?'

Instead of answering, Ghastly looked past her at the sound of an approaching engine. Valkyrie and Skulduggery turned as well, to see the beam of the headlight of a motorbike precede the arrival of the beautiful being that was Tanith Low, killing the engine and climbing off the bike. Valkyrie and Skulduggery looked on as Ghastly strode between them, right up to Tanith and kissed her fiercely, and she him.

'I'll take that as a yes, so' grinned Valkyrie to Skulduggery, a warm relief settling over her.

Alas, it was short-lived. Ghastly pulled back from Tanith, tucked a flyaway hair behind her ear affectionately, and the two of them turned back to their friends.

'Tanith,' Skulduggery inclined his head in greeting.

'Hi Skulduggery, Val,' she said turning to Valkyrie. Her expression wasn't as warm as usual; it was almost concerned. The uneasiness stole back into Valkyrie.

'So…what's going on?' she asked, forcing some good humour into her voice to drown out the nerves. 'You guys are together? This is great!'

A vague smile crossed Tanith's lips, not a grin or a sneer but a real smile, something Tanith rarely allowed anyone to see. Ghastly's expression stayed sombre, his features looked weary, the lines on his face more prominent than before, but his hand, seemingly of it's own accord, wound around Tanith's by his side. Tanith didn't smile for long.

'Val…' She was struggling, looking at her friend with such a pained expression that Valkyrie took a step closer.

'What, Tanith?' She looked from her to Ghastly and back, and then around to Skulduggery, who had gravitated forward after her. 'What's wrong?'

Skulduggery was looking at Tanith and Ghastly. He seemed uneasy.

'Val,' Tanith said quietly, 'we know.'

Valkyrie took a step back into Skulduggery.

'We know about Darquesse'


	12. Chapter 12

Valkyrie thought fast. And apparently not very successfully.

'What about Darquesse?' she asked with wide eyes, feigning ignorance.

She received two unimpressed looks from Ghastly and Tanith. She couldn't give up the game just yet, so turned exaggeratedly back to Skulduggery, his hand lightly holding her upper arm. 'What are they talking about?'

Skulduggery paused for a moment, shrugged almost unnoticeably, and to his credit, went along with the laughable pretence.

'Heavens, I have no idea. What do you mean, Tanith and Ghastly? Have you uncovered a secret about Darquesse?'

Valkyrie scrunched up her face as she turned back to her friends, raising her eyebrows in vague hope. 'Yes, have you uncovered a secret about who Darquesse is?'

For the briefest of moments she wanted to laugh out loud, as she pictured herself and Skulduggery standing there, twins in their ridiculous attempt at a cover up, down to the matching baffled expressions. Then she could cling to the last shred of hope no longer. Tanith and Ghastly were staring them down, their faces a mixture of unease and impatience.

She visibly sagged as she sighed. She had hoped, naively, that it would never come to this. The implications of the situation crashed around her as they revealed themselves in full. There was no going back once she said it.

'How did you find out?'

The admittance seemed to be the unravelling of them all.

Tanith reeled, and leaned back against one of the bollards lining the river. Ghastly ran a hand over his head and back, finally resting it over his eyes. Her partner breathed heavily behind her, and paced away a few steps wearily, tucking his thumbs into his belt. Valkyrie didn't move, not even her eyes. There they stood.

Skulduggery kept up a mental stream of curses for approximately ten minutes straight. He had known they would never be able to keep the secret forever, especially not from their best friends. But he had never pictured this moment, the moment of revelation, of realisation. He had been a fool not to, really. It would seem that being a fool was becoming a regular habit of his. Never in his four hundred plus years had he spent so much time reflecting on things he should have done differently than since he met this troublesome, inescapable girl. Well, not since he had met her, for the first few years he had kept his head. It was only of late…

He turned his attention back to the horrific silence. He needed to be his brilliant, analytic, detached self, now more than ever. They depended on it, _his partner_ depended on it. Things could only get worse from here on in.

The skeleton walked slowly back over to stand beside Valkyrie, shoulder to shoulder. Ghastly gave him a long, hard look. 'Skulduggery…'

'I couldn't tell you Ghastly'

The tailor didn't look hurt; he was too intelligent for that. 'I understand that. But this is… this is…'

'…Too big' finished Tanith. 'This is huge, guys. It's not about how you are embarrassed, or how we might judge you, this is- '

'Embarrassed?' cut in Valkyrie angrily. 'You think I never told you because I was _embarrassed?_' She practically spat the word. Tanith was taken aback.

'I am _terrified_' Valkyrie said quietly. 'There are no words…'

Skulduggery's hypothetical heart went out to her. Tanith tried to start again.

'Val, listen. You have to think this through. You have to think of the consequences! You can't keep this to yourselves- '

Skulduggery felt Valkyrie physically tense beside him, head to toe.

'Don't.'

She said it so quietly but so forcibly that Tanith stopped speaking.

'Don't, _don't_, suggest that I have not _thought this through._ Don't try to tell me, to tell _us, _to think of the consequences. How _dare- _' she stopped herself with a deep breath. 'How could you possibly assume that you have thought about this more than we have? How could you possibly think that this information has done anything but consume every waking moment of my life since I found out? Have _you_ thought this through? Do _you _realise what this means?!'

She was trembling, with rage or fear Skulduggery wasn't certain. Tanith, he realised, was crying silently, tears leaking from her eyes and staining her leathers. Ghastly looked pained, so pained, as if he were physically hurt.

'If I can't stop myself, I kill everyone'. Valkyrie wasn't crying. Skulduggery believed she was past tears. 'My family, my little sister, _you_, him,' she gestured back to Skulduggery, 'the other Elders, everyone in the Sanctuary, everyone in the _country_…' She sounded dulled, emotionless. Skulduggery understood. She had known all this for so long, been horrified and appalled for so long, that it had lost the shock. She sounded detached. It made him uneasy.

'I'm sorry we didn't tell you' Valkyrie continued. 'And I'm sorry you found out elsewhere. But I'd do it a hundred times over, and if there was any way to stop you from knowing I would pay anything to make it happen.'

The weight of her words settled around them, like dust after an explosion. And they were weighted indeed. Skulduggery was surprised, he admitted to himself. He had always assumed that Val wanted Tanith and Ghastly to know, but knew that she couldn't tell them. This was different, she was admitting to wanting to shut them out completely. By their expressions, he could see they were both realising this as well. He could sense an impasse on the horizon, and could see no bypass route.

'Val,' Tanith began, slowly and delicately. 'I approached that badly, I'm sorry. Of course I can't understand. I can't even begin to try. But we need to talk about this. This is a good thing that we know now. You two don't have to cope with this alone. We can all discuss it together, bounce ideas off one another, try solving it as a team. We are a team in every other aspect of our lives, and you need us more than ever.'

This was positive, Skulduggery assessed. Not that they knew the secret, he was still convinced that was a disaster, but that they were willing to talk about it. Ghastly was still unnervingly silent, however.

Valkyrie nodded, standing as close to Skulduggery as possible. He wouldn't let this ruin everything, he swore to himself. This would not be the beginning of the end.

Tanith resumed, her eyes earnest, leaning towards her best friend. 'You agree? We can tackle this together? For everyone's sake.' She glanced at Ghastly, standing half a step behind her.

Skulduggery knew his friend too well; he knew what he was thinking. In hindsight, he had always known how Ghastly would react to this, in the back of his mind. It was why, perhaps subconsciously or perhaps not, he had known not to tell him. And he could understand his reasoning. For God's sake, it _should _be his _own_ reaction. If he were in any other position, if it were _anyone_ else, the solution would be clear, and unavoidable. But it was not anyone else. It was Valkyrie. He was acutely aware of the hypocrisy, of the danger and the risk. Which is why when Ghastly finally spoke, he could anticipate almost down to the exact words what he was going to say. And which is why Skulduggery had made up his mind about what they had to do before Ghastly had a chance to speak at all.

'Valkyrie, Tanith and I have spent the last three days pondering this at length. We think that the best thing to do is to inform the council. This cannot be kept a secret from the mages that run our country.' Ghastly spoke without flinching, a steeliness in his face that couldn't mask the sadness in his eyes. Skulduggery admired him for it; for making the decision and for saying the words to her face. He knew Ghastly was aware of the consequences of his suggestion, that the council would kill Valkyrie without hesitation, sanctuary official or not. And he knew that Ghastly loved Valkyrie, there was no doubt about it. Fighting alongside someone for the guts of ten years had that effect. It made his decision even braver.

But Skulduggery was in too deep for that, too far gone for the honourable choice. He felt Valkyrie sag a little beside him, but she held her head valiantly. 'I understand' she said, no tremble to her voice. 'I always knew this was the only way.'

'While I agree this is the only option, there is an intelligent way to go about it, that doesn't necessarily end in Valkyrie's immediate death' said Skulduggery brusquely. 'I have a few suggestions I've been contemplating for some time. Can we reconvene somewhere more private and sensible than the banks of the river Liffey?' He had a bite to his tone that he knew was necessary.

Tanith looked troubled but less distressed now that Valkyrie appeared to be willing to hear them out. Ghastly's expression was dubious, but there was a touch of relief to his features as well. Despite their words, they acted as though they didn't fully trust Valkyrie any more, as if they were relieved that she had just agreed to her own execution. Skulduggery both understood it and loathed them for it. That was the trouble with this whole set of circumstances; he was able to completely rationalise how everyone else was to react and behave, but for the life of him (figuratively) he _could _only do the opposite. No one else was in her corner; best friend, sister, employer, boyfriend, whoever – they were all more concerned with the fate of the world. As he should be. This was insanity.

Ghastly had started speaking again, he realised. 'You're right,' he conceded, 'this is madness. Come to the shop, we can speak privately and be warm.' Skulduggery nodded and led Valkyrie back to the Bentley. Ghastly gave Tanith's hand a squeeze and headed presumably towards his own van, while Tanith swung a leg over her bike and donned her helmet with the distinct air of resignation found in a soldier heading to battle.

Valkyrie slid into the passenger seat and drew the seatbelt over her shoulder slowly, reluctantly. Skulduggery started the engine.

She looked up at him, her expression both resigned and fearful. 'It was inevitable, I suppose' she said, with more optimism than her face could muster. 'This is for the best, it takes the choice out of our hands.'

He looked at her and said nothing, his head cocked to one side, then put the car into gear and pulled away from the curb.

'We've needed an ultimatum from the start, the only problem was that neither of us could bring ourselves to set one,' she continued, in that same strange high-pitched voice that was unsettlingly unnatural. 'Both of us were too invested; I in my own life, obviously, and you in my excellent skills as an irreplaceable partner.' She looked at him again and gave a weak smile.

Skulduggery didn't respond, didn't even look at her this time.

'Come on, Skul, it couldn't last forever' Her voice caught. 'At least it's our friends, at least we can do it on our terms…' He looked away from her, as they sped through empty, narrow streets. She could tell he was angry from his grip on the steering wheel; she didn't even need to see how he held his head.

Valkyrie felt it all catch up with her. Her temples pounded and her throat ached with the effort of trying to hold back tears. She crumbled, noiselessly, and let the tears flow. If Skulduggery was sinking into a place of anger now when she needed him most, she didn't think she would manage to find the strength to face Tanith and Ghastly, or the council, or anyone at all. She wasn't sure if facing death was possible when you had left so much unsaid to the living.

She wept silently, staring out the window, hiding her face from Skulduggery while he drove in silence at break neck speeds. They passed buildings, giving way to housing estates, and then suburban parks and roads, then fields, then mountains…

_Mountains._

Valkyrie sat up, and peered out the window, pressing her hand against the cool glass. There were no mountains on the way to Ghastly's shop.

'Skulduggery?' she turned to him, forgetting to dry her eyes. 'Skul, where are we? Where are we going?'

He turned his face to look at her, and suddenly she realised he wasn't angry, he was filled with that unyielding, all-consuming determination that he kept reserved for only his most remarkable plans. She felt her heart start to race, not entirely sure why.

'I think you deserve a little more than an ultimatum, Valkyrie'


End file.
